To All The Foods I’ve Loved Before


How do I miss thee, Crouton?  Let me count the ways…

I yearn for your crunchy, buttery, and herby deliciousness.  I crave the respite you provide from boring and tasteless salad greenery.

You are gone from my plate, but never my heart!


And you, Mashed Potatoes, my smooth, creamy, salty, yummy, and occasionally garlicky pal.  Appearing on innumerable plates as a trusty starchy side dish, we spent many a good meal together.  Alas,  we must now end our life-long friendship.

Parting is such sweet buttery sorrow.


I also grieve the loss of assorted Bread Buddies. With crisp exteriors and soft and fluffy centers, you invited me to join you with assorted delectable spreadables.  Nothing will diminish my fond memories of our times together.

Be gone, enticing rolls and baguettes!  Ciao, my magnificent carb-laden chums!

These and other “gateway” foods were dropped from my diet for the first few months.  I just knew I couldn’t eat them in moderation.  Better to focus all my eating energy on integrating healthy proteins, fruits, and vegetables into my daily routine.

When you can’t control what’s on your plate…

  • Remove the temptation (“No, we don’t want rolls at the table.  Thank you.”).
  • Push the dangerous food to the very furthest edge of the plate.
  • Pour an excessive amount of salt/pepper/tabasco on whatever dangerous food is calling to you (childish, but effective).
  • Offer whatever it is to a skinny friend who’s dining with you (joking…sort of…)
  • Drink a gallon of water and eat everything else (healthy) on your plate.  If you’re still hungry for the”bad” food, drink another gallon of water. Repeat until full or you have to excuse yourself from the table for fear of bursting…
  • Arrange the food into a sad face and take a picture of it (embarrassing yourself and your table-mates in the process).

Finally, if you really want it –  I mean REALLY REALLY want it.  If you truly believe your day (week, month) will be ruined if you don’t have it – then, for God’s sake, EAT IT!!!

That’s right!  Put the food in your mouth, chew it very deliberately, and swallow it with a smile on your face.  Savor every teeny sinful morsel.  Enjoy the heck out of it!

It takes more than one indulgence to blow up a healthy eating habit.  An occasional roll or dessert marks a temporary exit from your plan – easily recoverable. You can compensate by eating lighter the next meal or day (or days, depending on the indulgence).

Jumping back on the bandwagon is much easier when you make a conscious decision to temporarily get off.

There’s a period of adjustment when you make a commitment to healthy eating.  The calorie sources change, but the cravings remain strong for a while.

Honestly, it was a tough adjustment for me to think of fruits and veggies as staple foods.  That’s why I avoided ALL of my high temptation foods at the beginning of my health improvement adventure.

But, I think it’s important to avoid feeling overly deprived.  It’s all about making smart eating decisions.  Of course, making smart decisions assumes there’s thinking involved.  That can be tough.

It’s challenging to think before I eat all the time.  It’s exhausting.  Then again, thoughtless eating is what got me here in the first place (lightbulb-flashing-over-my-head kind of realization).

Net/net, avoid your “trigger” food if your willpower is weak, but don’t be a martyr.  Feeling perpetually deprived leads to frustration and failure.

Smart Eating and Moderation is Your Ticket to Success.

(thus ends my hunger avoidance homily)


About Barbara

Married to Greg, the nicest Greek man in the world. No kids - just two hyperactive Maine Coon cats - Griffin and Harper. Independent consultant. News and political junkie. Diehard social progressive. Movie lover. Book reader. Blog writer. Overweight. Underpaid. Open-minded about everything except closed-minded folks. Occasionally witty. Sometimes wise. Always wise-ass.
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